Just a little something of a personal nature

I'm just going to say it, for years I have been ashamed to call myself a Christian. When the subject came up I would stress that I was a universalist or a religious pluralist. I would let them know that in no uncertain terms that I was not "Christian" as such. A more apt description would be that my beliefs sprang from the Christian tradition. That I had evolved beyond traditional beliefs and had adpoted practices from many spiritual paths across the spectrum.

Maybe it's because of where I live. Idaho is not known for it's religious moderation. To be identified as a "Christian" in my world is to be identified with the LDS Church, Conservative Evangelicals, Fundamentalists or maybe even one of the Neo-Nazi organizations that operate under the guise of religion. They vote conservitive Republican to a man/woman, and seem to stand in opposition to everything I hold dear. The beliefs they espouse seemed to range from naive to downright dangerous.

I found myself rejecting most everything stemming from the Abrahamic religions in favor of the Dharmic paths. All the Abrahamic religions seemed to teach intolerance and exclusivity. Yes, there are some voices who speak out against such rhetoric, but all we have to do is look at the media and see who's voice is loudest. I've turned my back on them and have walked a Buddhist-Philosophical Taoist path for some time now, supplementing my faith with the Gospels of Thomas, Truth, and Silvanus. Binding it all together with the tethers of personal mysticism.

Somethings has happened lately....I don't know really how to describe it. It does not feel like a spiritual leading or any sort of nudge from the divine, yet it smacks of the personal revelatory experience. As I've been moving through my texts I've been reading tangential materials. And...much to my surprise, I find myself being consumed with renewed interest in a tradition I had all but abandoned.

There are schools of thought within the Christian tradition that resonate with me. Creation Spirituality as envisioned by Matthew Fox, Process Theology, Borg, Spong, Crossan, Funk and others speak deeply to my condition, even more than at the height of my Jesus Seminar years.

I'm still not sure weather or not Jesus ever existed, or was a morphing of Hellenized Jewish thought and Mystery religions. I'm still filled with doubt that even if he lived, that his death was anything but a tragedy. But, that's not important to me anymore. What is important is what the mythos surrounding Jesus might be able to do for us, and maybe even for me.

I doubt I'll ever move back into the tradition of my youth fully. But, perhaps I might be able to glean something from "the faith that once was" and incorporate, or should I say reincorporate it into my current spiritual makeup.